The Curb

TheRktmn · Posted: Wed May 24, 2017 8:19 am Post subject:

You forgot the

G68 · Posted: Wed May 24, 2017 8:41 am Post subject:

johnboy · Posted: Wed May 31, 2017 7:36 pm Post subject:

just heard the expression
"This place is deader than a Texas salad bar" :rofl:

Jan Ove · Posted: Wed Jun 14, 2017 2:50 pm Post subject:

A man walked into a dress shop and told the clerk he wanted to buy an evening gown for his wife as a surprise.

"What size?" asked the clerk.

The man shrugged blankly.

Trying to help, the clerk inquired, "Well then, what are your wife's measurements?"

The man thought for a moment. "Small, medium, large and in that order."

Jan Ove · Posted: Wed Jul 05, 2017 3:58 pm Post subject:

This couple comes to a new town and the guy gets a job at the local pickle factory. A few years go by and each year he wins the employee of the year award. One day in the 3rd year, he comes home looking all depressed.

His wife asks him what the matter is, to which he responds that he got fired.

"FIRED?!? How can you get fired, you're always employee of the year!!" she asked, stunned.

To this he responds that he had another fantasy that he needed to fulfill and it got him fired...

"Oh no, not again...What did you do this time?" she asks.

"Well, I always fantasized about sticking my 'you know what' in the pickle slicer."

"You didn't!" she hoped.

He blushed and replied, "Well, yes I did."

Then she asks, "Did it hurt?"

"No, not really," answers the man.

Puzzled she then asks, "Well what happened to the pickle slicer??"

He answers, "Oh, she got fired too!"

TheRktmn · Posted: Wed Oct 25, 2017 11:59 am Post subject:

After a long day's work in the lab, Pavlov sits down in the pub for a cold beer and some snacks.
Everything's calm, until somebody rings the bell for the waiter.
Pavlov immediately tenses up, jumps from his chair (almost knocking over his pint), exclaiming: "Holy shit! I have to feed the damn dog!"

mo2872 · Posted: Thu Oct 26, 2017 7:27 am Post subject:

G68 · Posted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 7:16 am Post subject:

Wife
--"Where the hell have you been? You said you'd be done with golf by noon."

Husband
--"I'm so sorry Honey....but you probably don't want to hear the reason."

Wife--"I want the truth, and I want it NOW!"

Husband--"Fine. We finished in under 4 hours; a quick beer in the Clubhouse�'. I hopped into the car, and would have been here by 12 noon but on the way home, I spotted a
girl half our age struggling with a flat tire.

I changed it in a jiffy, and next she's offering me money. Of course I refuse it, then she tells me she was headed to the bar at the Sheraton and begs me to stop by so she can buy me a beer. She's such a sweetie, I said yes.

Before you know it, one beer turned into three or four, and I guess we were looking pretty good to each other.

Then she tells me she has a room right there at the Sheraton, less than 50 steps from our table. She suggested we get some privacy while pulling me by the hand.

Now I'm in her room...clothes are flying...the talking stopped�and we proceeded to have sex in every way imaginable. It must have gone on for hours, because before I know it, the clock says 5:30. I jump up, throw my clothes on, run to the car, and here I am. There. You wanted the truth... You got it.

Wife--"Bullshit! You played 36 holes, didn't you?"